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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: October 3rd, 2023

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  • My grandpa passed a year ago now, COPD. Likely honestly a heart attack after all the steroid meds for his lungs created heart problems including a heart aneurysm. When he was diagnosed way back in 2006 they told us he had 5 years if he was lucky, I didn't think he'd see me graduate HS. Well he had a lot more than 5 years in him but after about 2014 it was all shit. He started telling my grandma that he was ready to die, wanted to die, in 2018, he begged for it on hard nights. He tried to kill himself in 2021 and 2022. Both attempts left him strapped to a hospital bed "for his safety" as he struggled to breathe, he hadn't been able to reliably breathe laying on his back for several years by then but they didn't care as long as he lived.

    I never felt anything but sympathy for him after those attempts. As someone with chronic lifelong asthma, I know how my end will go. I know what it's like to suffocate and struggle to breathe and in case anyone wonders, it fucking sucks. It's terrifying, it's slow, and you know it's coming. Panic is inevitable. He felt like that for nearly 10 fucking years. He told me once after it had gotten bad that he'd always felt so bad for me as a kid to have asthma but now he finally understood, he said I was so brave to have dealt with it for so long but in that moment I didn't feel brave I felt lucky. When I use my inhaler I can breathe again, for him it just made him struggle less. For a long time I wished he would die, my absolute favorite person on the planet, and I wanted them dead. It destroyed me mentally for years. When he finally did die it was horribly sad and also such a massive relief for everyone to know that at least he wasn't suffering anymore.

    I say all this, partially to get it off my chest but mostly to say, if we are going to prolong life we need to also give people the option to check out. Life isn't life without quality of health, it's just suffering. Prolonging suffering makes use torturers, it's not a saving grace. If we have the capacity to do this for our pets then people deserve the same mercy.




  • Fuck the CDC and late stage capitalism. One of my best friends is in a wheelchair for the rest of her life because of Long COVID, she can't walk a few feet without being so out of breath she passes out. My mom got Long COVID the first and now the second time she's been infected. She still coughs every time she walked around or does any activities. She has to carry an inhaler now but she doesn't have asthma, just Long COVID. She got COVID only a few weeks ago and it's was most definitely NOT like the flu for her or anyone I've known that's gotten it.



  • It's quieter which I love and hate. I don't feel addicted to engaging here which is awesome for my mental health but it can also make it difficult to find instances. I'm still struggling there.

    However, when I do comment I find the people to be much more open to discussion. There are actual engaging conversations to be had which has been a great change. It feels less like shouting into the vast nothingness of the internet here, more intimate like a club of people with similar interests. I don't feel scared I'm going to get dogged on, flammed, harassed, othered, or ostracized. There have been times I've shared my Native background when it was important to the convo and everyone's be so fucking cool just treating me like a human being or listening to what I have to contribute from my perspective. Doing that on Reddit was a mixed bag where I would have to worry about the possibility of a sleu of people PMing me or replying with just awful hateful small pp energy racist shit.

    Honestly, the bar was in the deepest pits of hell so if Lemmy couldn't shuffle over it I would have lost all hope for humanity lol




  • I'm neridivergent and have issues with misophonia. Your description of listening to people eat was spot on. Hearing people chew food or smack gum makes me want to smack the gum the fuck up out of their mouth. I like these people but the reaction that misophonia causes in me feels barely containable. I've had to walk away from people to collect myself or have someone else help customers because of the physical and psychological reaction it causes. It feels violent and torturous. I also have this same reaction to kids and babies being loud or crying. Yes, your crotch goblin is cute. Yes, I recognize that they are kids and these things aren't controllable. But that doesn't stop me from having serious sound stimulation overloads that bring me to the brink of sanity, that's not controllable either no matter how much I wish it was. .

    OP, best way to deal with it if it is a misophonia issue is to carry around ear plugs or do what I do and get some nice noise cancelling earbuds. If you're in a situation that you cant use these things, like a family gathering of people who won't understand what you're going through, take frequent breaks. Go outside, go take a breather on the bathroom, talk with someone you trust and see if they will step aside with you for a bit because I'm 100% sure there are others there that don't want to hear the kids being loud.





  • I obviously I can't speak for the OP you are questioning but I'm also on that demi spectrum, if you want my two cents.

    It's not that I can't see that someone is attractive, it's just that I don't find them sexually attractive. I'm sure there are a lot of het men that would agree that Timothée Chalamet or Chris Evans are very attractive and handsome men but that doesn't mean that they want to have sex with them. It's not like people go around looking at beautiful art or gorgeous sunsets and think "man, I'd really like to fuck that" lol

    I believe they also mentioned that they didn't find them interesting, not that they found them unattractive. I have the same issue. When these apps are set up for looks first no one really bothers to sound overly interesting, they just want to come off as fuckable and not a murder.


  • FFXIV

    I don't PVP so I can't speak to that but the lore and PVE is solid. Gameplay is very classic MMO. The releases continue to be ranked and reviewed higher with each one that comes out. Players are strongly encouraged to help new players (sprouts) via the mentoring program. Community has been so good, very helpful, never seen anyone rage or get angry at a new person, or anyone for that matter. Very LGBTQ+ friendly. TONS of fun stuff to do on the side between chapters like glamour or housing for folks that want a chill experience or you can do savage raids or hunts for the more hardcore game play focused players. Me and a friend love to just run around to all the apartments and houses to check out everyone's place from time to time. Some are really amazing. I'll throw mine and my buddy's apartment in that ring we put a lot of work in and did some really cool tricks to make the space feel bigger and more unique. Some people turn their houses into cafes or dance clubs, some require RPing when you visit some don't. They are pretty fun to go to. From time to time they'll have giveaways for gill or items at the parties.

    BONUS: It's totally free up to level 70 so you have plenty of time to figure out if the game is for you.

    I'm not playing right now, taking a quick break but I'm in the NA server Sargatanas. The name is Obi-Bun Kenobi, I think I have the address to my place in my Adventurer Plate. I leave the apartment unlocked so people can use it for g-posing or just to have a nice place to hang. Come check it out sometime!





  • Yes and no, it's not a black and white issue. I didn't really want to go all in on the topic because it's Googleable. My grandpa recently passed and it's very expensive, we were looking for alternatives. On a federal level natural burial is allowed. The states take matters into their own hands. Some require burial vaults, some require embalming, some require that natural burials only happen in very specific places, and some require a mix of those things. It's doable but if they can squeeze money out of you through laws or extreme inconvenience, they will. It's not as easy and just picking a spot and burying a loved one, in a lot of cases.