Talking Heads is the Devil’s music.

Why doesn’t Hagrid, who is the largest of the characters, simply eat Voldemort?

The Venn Diagram between people who actually support this and people who just want to own the libs is a circle.

Anybody who believes that he would actually do this is someone who would fall for the wallet inspector.

Barf

Or too little

It’s Canary M. Burns who’s in charge.

Paul Rudd on Conan when he shows a clip from his latest project and it’s a scene from the 1987 film Mac and Me.

The Jetsons?

You have a house?

I’m not worried, I have paper!

Where’s Skifree?

Bonerland

Damn leftist, they ruined leftism!

Could Joey Chestnut eat hamburgers like that?

Brah, you just need to have a rock star attitude about being 27.

Too bad he couldn’t be stuck in Weird Al’s accordion.

My school taught me that most people in Columbus’ time thought that the Earth was flat and that Columbus would fall off the face of the earth during his voyage.

If only Phil could’ve relived the same day over and over again until he was able to patch things up with his wife.