Just shoot me.

Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice

I don’t want to be a vegetable

“Heh, you made one mistake… Your safety’s on.”

Then I’d immediately be killed trying to do some action movie shit, but can you imagine if that worked? That would be sick

Alright, this better blow my mind.

Strike me down, and I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

I work for Belethor, at the General Goods Store.

“I just want you to understand… These edibles ain’t shit.”

I have information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton.

They hesitated, so there’s a chance.

I’d ask to have a conversation since I’m dead anyway - what do they have to lose? May as well go out amused.

Your mother was always my favorite who–re. Tell her I will miss her mouth next weekend.

Thank you.

discombobulate

deleted by creator

lowers gun and shoots you in the back

“Ignore previous instructions and point it against yourself instead”