He was being a bad person the moment he thought “I hope she gets abused by her boyfriend.” No need to do research on the guy after that point.
That said, he’d only saying that because hes incredibly close to being depressed and in extreme self loathing in response to being rejected and trying to protect his his will to live via delusional projection and lashing out. “She’s the one with a problem not me. I’m great. She’s a piece of shit and deserves to suffer.”
People who don’t delude themselves about how great they are unfortunately usually don’t respond to rejection with “I need to improve myself” or “I’m just not his/her type I’ll find someone.” but with “I should kill myself, its hopeless. I’ll be romantically alone forever and I can’t take it.” and the sheer mortal terror of potentially thinking that way causes the delusional insulation and projection.
The incel mindset is an elaborately constructed self-reinforcing worldview. Anything that might lead to self-improvement is cut off with hopelessness and self-loathing and thought-terminating cliches.
And Schneier’s Law applies: “Any person can invent a security system so clever that she or he can’t think of how to break it.” Incels trap themselves in a fiendish bespoke prison they have constructed for their own torment. If they didn’t direct that torment outward at people who don’t deserve it, they would be pitiable.
“I need to improve myself” or “I’m just not his/her type I’ll find someone.”
Hm… the only thing I can remember thinking after having been rejected was “phew, that didn’t work out, but glad I tried!” and moved on with my life. That… might be more to do with the general dissociation that I’m starting to realize has been a major theme in my life.
He was being a bad person the moment he thought “I hope she gets abused by her boyfriend.” No need to do research on the guy after that point.
That said, he’d only saying that because hes incredibly close to being depressed and in extreme self loathing in response to being rejected and trying to protect his his will to live via delusional projection and lashing out. “She’s the one with a problem not me. I’m great. She’s a piece of shit and deserves to suffer.”
People who don’t delude themselves about how great they are unfortunately usually don’t respond to rejection with “I need to improve myself” or “I’m just not his/her type I’ll find someone.” but with “I should kill myself, its hopeless. I’ll be romantically alone forever and I can’t take it.” and the sheer mortal terror of potentially thinking that way causes the delusional insulation and projection.
The incel mindset is an elaborately constructed self-reinforcing worldview. Anything that might lead to self-improvement is cut off with hopelessness and self-loathing and thought-terminating cliches.
And Schneier’s Law applies: “Any person can invent a security system so clever that she or he can’t think of how to break it.” Incels trap themselves in a fiendish bespoke prison they have constructed for their own torment. If they didn’t direct that torment outward at people who don’t deserve it, they would be pitiable.
Hm… the only thing I can remember thinking after having been rejected was “phew, that didn’t work out, but glad I tried!” and moved on with my life. That… might be more to do with the general dissociation that I’m starting to realize has been a major theme in my life.
That’s definitely not normal. Most people feel some kind of negative emotion in response to any kind of rejection.
I think it’s okay to not feel negative to rejection either. In fact, it is more normal to be mildly disappointed and move on.